....clueless, classless, or just plain CONFUSED

We live in an era where the norms are set by society. The majority rules!! Trial-by-jury allows 12 peers of the accused to decide their fate…INNOCENT or GUILTY…the majority rules! When a Bill goes to the Senate, the majority rules!!  Twenty-first century –2011 is the year…the era of the majority rules.

Unfortunately, that major stipulation of life leaves much to be addressed and even more unanswered. The majority is NOT always right. Do I lead? Do I follow; or do I just flee and create my own path?

In the earlier eras men were considered to be the “head of the home”. They were the providers. Today, there are women who make equal, if not more, than the man. Wives go to work and husbands are stay-at-home dads. So does he lose his seat at the head of the table? The majority rules!

In my childhood, you talked back to an adult, not just your parents, you would get knocked into the middle of next week. I missed many weekends with my sassy mouth! Today, there are kids who tell their parents how things are going to go down as it pertains to them (the children!)…the majority rules; right?

Modesty. Well, even as far back as I can remember we had the Madonna’s and Larry Blackmon’s when it came to “what the hell” dressing; however, today, it is the norm for women to be paraded around like skinned rabbits at a Hugh Hefner Bunny Farm. It is only natural for a man to look, and it is VERY natural for a real man to be disgusted and a real woman to teach her daughters, that SEXY is a state of mind and attire is a personal characteristic ~don’t shoot the messenger~.

What is my point?

Simple, today, we hear, “that is so not ladylike”, “where is your femininity?” “That’s not how a real man rolls!” ~in my Charlie Brown voice~ “Bwha Bwha Bwha Bwha! SHUDDY”!



Erin @Club in ATL

I was raised to sit with my legs crossed, talk soft in order to be seen and not heard, put my hands down by my side and see if those shorts or skirt reached my fingertip! I had a curfew…it need not be stated, I knew it already (the street lights). Low and behold, I knew that yes meant “yes” and no meant “no”. DAMN a majority! The majority did not leave in Lula’s house; therefore, Lula was not concerned with the majority!

Now, society says that it is not lady-like …no, it is out of character for a lady to do certain things such as drink out in public, laugh too loud, curse too much, burp, or dare I type, release air from their posterior ~see, that doesn’t even read right~…release flatulence—nope still doesn’t read accurate….FART ~whoop there it is~!

Well, Momma told me the ugliest thing in the world was a drunken woman in public. If we ever just wanted or needed to drink, do it in the comfort of your own home. Momma said, “Women mother their children.” Not birth. Any lady can birth a baby, but a WOMAN mothers her children. Momma would ask, “Where yawl think yawl going with that mess on?” See, a woman knew that heavy make-up and revealing clothes does not make one a WOMAN. If you notice, Momma always used the word WOMAN.

I’m not the majority, but I conclude that today’s LADIES are clueless, classless, or just confused!

I sit with my legs crossed, but I talk loudly, I say what I want, and I admit, I curse too much! I respect that man is the head of my home. I refuse (even if it was possible) to make him think he was not. I am a fireball…a hell raiser…we are worst enemies and BEST FRIENDS…so  when I pop a top off a beer for him, I pop one for me! I sit back on the sofa in jeans and Tims and watch football and talk shit with HIM. We high-five! We argue…he burps, I belch! I cough; he pats and rubs my back! He coughs, I say, “Damn, Dude!” We laugh! 

Typical day for Erin


To society, I may not be a lady. I don’t dress half-naked and post pictures exposing my nudity on the web. I do not allow my daughters to dress in what “society” considers being sexy. I have no shame in telling them, “If I see you in a skirt that should be a shirt, I am going to knock your ass into another family!”

Why? Because, it is true; while by society norms their Mommy may not be a lady, she is not clueless, classless, nor confused. She is ALL WOMAN!

My Dolls

 

Erin & daughters



Growing up...my little WOMEN



©Erin Adams-Phillips. Erin’s Echo. All rights reserved.

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Music Inspiration for today Lisa Stansfield's All Woman

....weaker; is it really stronger?

(a)   Woman is the WEAKER vessel.

(b)   A man is not supposed to cry!

(c)    Girl, you got my rib! Give me my rib back!

(d)  God created you as a HELPER for me!

Myths. Facts. Old Wives Tales. We’ve heard them all before.

Isn’t it ironic how people can switch up the original meaning of things? Just butcher it up, mold and melt, melt and mold, shaping it for their personal meaning and life. Why is it so hard to accept situations for what they really are in life? Though I didn’t plan this, this entry will reflect back to:

(1)   The looking glass self—how people perceive others and “some” others try to base their WHO on how others see them.

(2)   Never changing—God doesn’t change…so yes, Eve was created from Adam’s rib (does the bible say a SLAB..half rack…baby back…I don’t know)…and woman was created to be a HELPER to man, but does that mean weaker vessel means weak-minded? OF COURSE NOT!

I really hate getting spiritual in my writings but sometimes, it is the only way I can make a VALID point.

“Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered” (1 Peter 3:7 ESV).

Vessel has many meanings. In that scripture note it states as a weaker vessel which is symbolic for a woman’s feminism. It doesn’t mean woman is MENTALLY weak.

Remember in the Garden of Eden, when the serpent spoke with Eve? God states Eve was THOROUGHLY deceived.

Genesis 3:13 reads, “Then the LORD God said to the woman, "What is this you have done?" The woman said, "The serpent deceived me, and I ate."

1Timothy 2:14 informs, “and Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor”.

The serpent did some convincing on Eve. Eve pretty much just said, “BITE THE FRUIT ADAM!”

Now, I wrote all that to ask, women, do you know your OWN power? I am not talking about your WORTH. I’m speaking of your POWER over man.

Women have the power to escalate or diminish a situation. Any given day, the beginning of day, middle of day, end of day, a man just wants to be a man! Society has brainwashed so many women into thinking that submissive means less than that they want to be so independent they have forgotten their REAL power.

If your husband comes home from a hard day of work and doesn’t feel like eating with the family, what will you do? Do you bitch and tell him this is family time?! Belittle him about not taking part in family outings?! Just yell and escalate the situation without knowing what is going on?! Or will you understand? Tell him you are going to eat with the kids and will check on him later!

Really, you don’t know what his day was like. You don’t know what is on his mind. Would it not be wiser to say, “Okay, Babe! I will make your plate and sit it in the microwave”... Give him a brief hug and kiss on the cheek to let him know whatever is wrong, we will work it out together!?

Do you know how that loving gesture can break him...make him forget all about his horrible day, because he just came home to the most beautiful, softest, greatest helper made just for him?

Yes, women, we have that power! It is in the tone of our voice, the wink of our eyes, the softness of our bodies. We have the power to make man melt  or make him erupt like a volcano.

Do you know your power?! Don’t deny yourself the beauty of knowing your strengths as well as your weaknesses. Do you know your power?!

DISCLAIMER: This is not true of all situations. If you feel that you are in physical danger due aggression or domestic violence, please contact the Domestic Violence Hotline at 1.800.799.SAFE (7233).