Friday, June 1, 2012

...bridging the connection: love, hurt, peace


© 2012. Erin’s Echo. All rights reserved. 

Relationships (professional, friend, intimate) begin for a reason and end for a reason. In those times, we may "connect" with others through that mutual friend. So, what happens when the lead relationship ends? If you are married and decide to end your marriage, do you divorce your mutual friends? No, you do not! The only people that can ever come between relationships are the people "directly" involved. No one else holds that power. If and when you give it up to someone else, you are not only just “hurt” you turn self into a victim by allowing suffering into your life. 

“Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.” – M. Kathleen Casey

We hurt…we cause hurt…we heal…we help others heal. We have to stop making excuses for ourselves and others and realize that things happen in life; therefore, it is imperative to find the good in bad and the happy in sad. No one can do that for you, but you. We cheat ourselves when we say, “I’m never going to…” whatever the circumstance may be. We cheat ourselves when we make ourselves feel shame and regret, when we should be viewing things as life experiences. We cheat ourselves when we put up defense mechanisms to protect our heart, body, and mind. We cheat ourselves when we say we forgive, but don’t forget. If you don’t forget, how can you forgive? We cheat ourselves when we enact revenge. It is okay to be hurt…again, pain is inevitable; so we only inflict more hurt on self when we seek revenge.

I know love & I know hurt, but, too, I know peace of mind!
I have never felt a pain as intense as a broken heart; however, just the same, I have never witnessed anyone die from a broken heart. A broken heart beats the same as an unbroken heart. The difference is the unbroken heart has never loved intimately, so the broken heart beats to wiser rhythm. 

In our personal lives and our professional lives, we write our own character resume. I’m so imperfect. I know that is hard to believe, but, really I am ~smile~. Yet the one thing I had ~notice the past tense there~ always been able to be proud of is, I never let another person’s actions dictate my own.  I never allowed hurt to guide me…people say love is blind…that is a myth; love sees perfectly clear…20/20 vision, but hurt is blind. Hurt invites in his/her unwanted and unneeded friends: misery, blame, anger, and revenge.  

It is a curious sensation: the sort of pain that goes mercifully beyond our powers of feeling. When your heart is broken, your boats are burned: nothing matters any more. It is the end of happiness and the beginning of peace.” – George B. Shaw

So, when we are hurt what should we do? We should let the happiness end. Remember the good times by finding the good in bad…the happy in the sad. Allow yourself to feel the hurt, but refuse to act on it in a negative manner.  If a person has wronged you, thank them for showing you who they truly are and embrace the beginning of peace. Sure, love is the greatest of all things, it is a unique feeling of the uninterrupted self, but who wants a love that interrupts peace of mind, heart, and soul!? Not I, and I am sure not you!

 
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